When Alex and I first married, we dreamed about one day being frequent travelers for both business and pleasure. Neither of us had ever traveled for business, but we certainly did plenty of pleasure traveling. We especially love cruises—leaving behind any sight of land, being surrounded by God’s life and breath of water, and most importantly, not being easily reachable! We usually plan our cruises far out in advance so we can have something to look forward to, to envision and get lost in our imaginings of it all. We even have one coming this November, our first cruise with our daughters, the week after this “70 in 7” Project concludes.
Not long after we married and returned from our first (honeymoon) cruise, we both did, in fact, start traveling with our jobs. At first, it was entertaining, something novel, thrilling even, a privilege, an enchantment. But like most novelties, the thrill eventually died, especially when the frequency began impeding on our newlywed style. Even when we lived in Peru, Alex and I made separate trips back and forth to Lima alone at times. Being apart from the one person you call “home” is never easy. But when we added in one child, and then a second, “easy” became as foreign to us as Spanish once was.
When the Lord first commissioned me to do the “70 in 7” Project, naturally I shared it with my husband; we talked about it, prayed about it, chose to proceed. We did not, however, expect to have so many things working against us. For example, Alex has had to travel every week—for partial or entire weeks—since the Project began on April 1st. This has never happened before in his job; in fact, he was recently promoted to a management position, with the expectation/requirement he’d be in the office (and at home) more often with the added responsibility of overseeing his team there. Our personal expectations, although initially hopeful, were clearly incorrect, at least for the time being. In addition, our church elders recently prayed against this seemingly new trend, asking Father to let Alex’s work be so successful that he’s sent home early. Guess what. His work was so successful, the client demanded Alex continue to return week after week to make sure everything continued to go so well! No one else was good enough for the job! After his last now-weekly trip, Alex even said to me, “When you started this project, I didn’t realize it was going to affect me so much!”
Well, I suppose it wouldn’t be life if we didn’t have opposition. Such as my next surgery coming up in the next two weeks, followed by two weeks of serious pain during recovery. Bound to put a damper on my goals in some way, I’m sure.
Or, I can choose a different perspective. 2 Corinthians 12:9 (Amplified) says,
But He said to me, My grace (My favor and loving-kindness and mercy) is enough for you [sufficient against any danger and enables you to bear the trouble manfully]; for My strength and power are made perfect (fulfilled and completed) and show themselves most effective in [your] weakness. Therefore, I will all the more gladly glory in my weaknesses and infirmities, that the strength and power of Christ (the Messiah) may rest (yes, may pitch a tent over and dwell) upon me!
Alex said something else to me after his last trip. He said, “Think of the testimony you will have” when I see that so much was accomplished even when Alex was not here to provide his constant strength and support for the Project. And he is right. When I cannot depend on my husband’s presence and companionship, when I am left to care for two very young children alone, when I am physically sick or in pain, or the children are sick, when I still must work toward my goals—I cannot do it in my own strength, for evidently, I have none. I must seek the Lord’s strength in my weakness. There I find His perfected power, His favor, His loving-kindness, His mercy. His affective rest.
This morning I walked into church on Mother’s Day with apparently a weird look on my face. A close friend asked if everything was okay. I replied, “My mind is engrossed, trying to wrap itself around the idea of another [partial] week without my husband at home.”
I was thinking hard. Too hard, really. And pining to pander in self-pity. But Father was having none of it. When we walked into the sanctuary, we began to worship Him with this song:
Christ alone; cornerstone, weak made strong; in the Savior’s love
Through the storm, He is Lord, Lord of all
When darkness seems to hide His face, I rest on His unchanging grace
In every high and stormy gale, my anchor holds within the veil
(Hillsong)
Followed by this song:
God I look to You, I won’t be overwhelmed
Give me vision to see things like You do
God I look to You, You’re where my help comes from
Give me wisdom; You know just what to do
I will love You Lord my strength, I will love You Lord my shield
I will love You Lord my rock forever, All my days I will love You God
Hallelujah our God reigns, Hallelujah our God reigns
Hallelujah our God reigns forever, All my days Hallelujah
(Bethel Music Publishing)
Need I say more? Well, yes, one more word of my own worship… AMEN.
(And stick around if you want to hear about the Glory of God in the end!)
The Art of Choosing True Life 