My Husband, My Leader [Mth 7-Day 7-Post 49]

This afternoon while our girls were napping, my husband, Alex, cuddled up next to me on the couch. Our whole family has been a bit under the weather lately, him included, so he worked from home today to rest a little. I was working on my laptop when he nestled his head into my lap, purposely trying to get in my way. He wanted a little attention and affection, which I was happy to provide. In his sweet little boyish tone, he said to me, “I really love the way the last few months have been between us, and I just don’t want it to end.”

Belief Statement #23: “My husband is God’s ordained leader of our family.
God gives him wisdom to take care of us and holds him responsible for it.
Therefore, I listen to, trust in and rely on his decisions
and do so with peace and contentment.
(i.e. Do it his way. His word goes.)”

Can you say “countercultural”? Yes, I know. That’s not what I was brought up believing either. My mother seemed to be the decision-maker in our household from what I could see. I was taught to be an independent woman, self-sufficient and strong as my own leader and caretaker. But that’s not God’s way. In August when I was composing my belief statements, I read the following excerpt of Ephesians 5 from Eugene Peterson’s The Message Bible at a dear friend’s wedding:

Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands.

Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor—since they’re already “one” in marriage.

No one abuses his own body, does he? No, he feeds and pampers it. That’s how Christ treats us, the church, since we are part of his body. And this is why a man leaves father and mother and cherishes his wife. No longer two, they become “one flesh.” This is a huge mystery, and I don’t pretend to understand it all. What is clearest to me is the way Christ treats the church. And this provides a good picture of how each husband is to treat his wife, loving himself in loving her, and how each wife is to honor her husband.

As I read these words during the wedding ceremony, it became powerfully alive in my heart and mind. Alex cherishes me, so I respect him. It’s that simple. And for that simple reason, as I have chosen to believe in Statement #23 (and the Word of God), our relationship is better than ever. And what a joy it was to celebrate that this October 1^st, the ten-year anniversary of our dating relationship.