A letter I wish I had gotten, a letter I wish I could send…
Dear One,
You matter to me, very much, and so I must say some things from the heart. I know that you have experienced many difficult things throughout your life, which have caused you deeper and deeper depression. The longer you have fought, the more you have drawn inward; you have chosen a “survival mode” over real living. You have buried your head in the sand to avoid being hurt any further. But in doing so, you have also shut out the light. You don’t think it’s possible to dig yourself out, so you have given up. At times, the earth moves, and suddenly you see a ray of light enter your pit, so you make one or two small changes in hopes that it will be enough. But it never is enough, because you’re not willing to do more than that. You’re not willing to fully surrender. You won’t release control because you’re afraid your world will collapse. Bury you completely. It’s hard enough to breathe as it is.
I’ve been there. I know. So many years and so many tears—you just don’t think there’s hope that life could be any different, that you could be healed and whole and happy. Good enough is good enough. If you can just get from sunup to sundown, get through your work day, get the chores done, get everyone else taken care of, get the bills paid, and get back into bed…that’s enough… But it’s not. You know that’s not what God intended for you. You know it in your mind but shrug it off as if it doesn’t matter. As if His real plan doesn’t matter, because you don’t care anymore whether you’re living in His plan. It hurts too much to care. It’s easier…just to not. Caring would require doing the work to bring forth change. And you have no intention or desire to add any more work to your plate. I get it. I get you.
Now, my Friend. Let’s talk Truth.
God really is Who He says He is. Whether you believe it or not, God does love You. He does care about your life, He does see your pain, He knows every thought before you think it and every word before you speak it. Quit your shrugging, your head-nodding, your eye twitching—accept it. Life does not have to carry on this way. And if you still don’t want to care, take your head out of the clouds for a minute and realize that Your life affects countless lives around you, most specifically the lives of your family members. Yes, they count on you, so you think “survival mode” is better than suicide, but do you really want your children to grow up living that way too? Surely they will, if you set that example for them. And quite frankly, do you know for certain they won’t someday disagree and choose suicide instead of living a sad, emotionless and empty life?
Someone must speak this Truth plainly. Your choices not only affect you but also generations that follow you. If you continue on this current path of self-hatred and stubborn immovability, your children will suffer harshly, your so-called “friends” will wash their hands with impatience, and you may grow old alone.
There is Hope. If you believe that God is available to those who truly seek Him, then you can find your turning point in this very moment. Lay down your pride. Every offer of help that comes your way, accept it. Surrender your goals, your dreams, your disappointments, your outrage. Surrender it all. Be willing to relinquish everything—yes, even your children—trusting that God returns one hundredfold everything that we are willing to give up.
So if you want to live a different life, have above and beyond the desires of your heart, save your children and your children’s children from a life of depression, and be happy and truly fulfilled… Let go. Seek Him. Find Him. Follow Him.
Do the Work. It’s Worth It.
The Art of Choosing True Life 