When a Dream Dies (39/40)

On the morning I turned 30, I got up like any other Saturday morning where we lived in Peru, and I made my way to the church where I taught my English class. Hard work, but I loved it. My students were eager to learn, and I was happy to teach them every week. Alongside my husband, we had made our little niche in San Juan de Lurigancho, and after more than a year’s toil, we were settled, our roles defined, our prospects bright. After class, I grabbed a taxi along with two nearby students to head home. I entered my building ready for a nap and walked up to our second floor apartment. Opening the door, I was greeted by a surprise party, complete with friends and Peruvian family…and a Mariachi band! That was a good day.

A few days later, things changed. A decision was made. And soon it would all come to an abrupt end. It was out of our control; we had to make the best of it. Our dream of living in Peru indefinitely was dead. A few months later, we were back in Atlanta trying to start over.

It would take years to heal those deep, resounding wounds. Slowly, the Lord has restored hope in our hearts for new dreams in Peru. And yet there is still one gaping wound, one dream that has suddenly died…again.

While we lived in Peru, Alex poured his heart and soul into building an enormous new church facility in Jicamarca. After so much hard work, together we “christened” the building in Peruvian style: hanging an empty bottle from the roof and throwing rocks at it until it breaks. We had a dream for that building to become not only a church, but a medical and sports complex as well. We wanted to host free medical clinics, build an entirely turf field and host soccer clinics and competitions, raise up a fully functional church family for the local community. It was a very big dream for a very big property. But it was a dream left behind when we returned to Atlanta.

However, upon the creation of Amor Real Ministries in 2016, the dream was reborn. Our new vision for the property was much the same only with a fresh set of hands and feet. Our friend Pastor Gimbler began a Sunday church service for the children of Jicamarca. The building got a fresh coat of paint inside and out. And we held our Vacation Bible Schools for those children there on every mission trip we planned. But our financial situation with this building was not on firm foundation. Our resource focus was on Pat’s Place, our shelter for abused women and their children in nearby San Juan. The ministry that still owns this building and Pat’s Place began to explore the idea of selling the Jicamarca property, while planning to hand Pat’s Place over to ARMS. And last week, it became a harsh reality when the property was sold to another ministry, called Reimagine.

While I am happy for Reimagine and its wonderful plans for this property, I must face the fact that our dream for it is, once again, dead. Reimagine is a wonderful sister ministry that will do great things for the community through its new headquarters they will build there. However, it leaves a gaping hole in my own heart where this long-time dream we had in the old and now our current ministry once resided for more than ten years. I find the need to share this pain so that I do not have to keep it locked up inside my hurting heart, and I can now bring it to God and ask Him for His comfort, healing, and wisdom in order to move on to bigger and better dreams with ARMS.

What does God say to us when a dream dies?

First, He offers us comfort:

  • “If your heart is broken, you’ll find God right there; if you’re kicked in the gut, he’ll help you catch your breath” (Psalm 34:18 MSG)
  • “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds [healing their pain and comforting their sorrow]” (Psalm 147:30 AMP).
  • “So we take comfort and are encouraged and confidently say, ‘The Lord is my Helper [in time of need], I will not be afraid. What will man do to me?’” (Hebrews 13:6 AMP).

Then, He revives us:

  • “This is my comfort in my affliction, that Your word has revived me and given me life” (Psalm 119:50).
  • “You who have shown me many troubles and distresses will revive and renew me again, And will bring me up again from the depths of the earth” (Psalm 71:20 AMP).
  • “He refreshes and restores my soul (life); He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake” (Psalm 23:3 AMP).

Finally, He gives us new dreams:

  • “Do not remember the former things, or ponder the things of the past. Listen carefully, I am about to do a new thing, now it will spring forth; will you not be aware of it? I will even put a road in the wilderness, rivers in the desert” (Isaiah 43:18-19 AMP).
  • “Forget about what’s happened; don’t keep going over old history. Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new. It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it? There it is! I’m making a road through the desert, rivers in the badlands” (Isaiah 43:18-19 MSG).
  • “He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God; Many will see and fear [with great reverence] And will trust confidently in the Lord” (Psalm 40:3 AMP).
  • “God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams” (Ephesians 3:20 MSG)!

The Truth of the matter is that God has not abandoned me in my sorrow. He is close to me; He understands my pain. He’s reaching a hand of comfort out to me, to hold me close to His heart so I can hear how it is beating now. God wants to replace the old dream with a new one, a better one, one that is just what He had planned from the beginning of time. I just have to listen closely, be patient, and allow Him to bring forth the new dream in His timetable. His spoken words are powerful and true; I will confidently wait on, trust in and rely on Him to complete the work that He has begun in me and ARMS.

If your dream has died, take heart. Let His Truth comfort you today. He is sovereign and in control of all things.

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