Am I undesirable? Is there something wrong with me? Why doesn’t anyone want to be my friend?
A wounded heart whispers behind shameful eyelids, wondering, wandering inside a pain-drained homebody built on the sand of confusion. It’s a lonely home where we all dwell at some point, sunk into emotions that rally the hurt, the sting of rejection. We ask why. But there is no response.
I have often found myself on the solitary side of those questions, and now I watch my children boxed in by the same pondering. We recently moved to Houston after almost 20 years in Atlanta, the only home my children had ever known. Even then the un-invitations frequented our days and nights, lonely and longing for welcome and acceptance, but stuck in the unnotice. It’s been almost nine months here; shouldn’t there be…more on our calendar?
What do I say to my children who think that they did something wrong—that they are something wrong—and look to me to gather up their hurt and kiss it better?
I tell them three things.
First, your worth is not determined by the opinions of other people.
Second, your worth is not determined by who you are, but by whose you are. You are a son or daughter of the King, royal in personhood, esteemed and loved. You need never work to earn your status.
And third, we were given life, not to be takers, but to be givers.
Here is a simple, rule-of-thumb guide for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you, then grab the initiative and do it for them. Add up God’s Law and Prophets and this is what you get.
Matthew 7:12 MSG
Rather than sinking deeper into gloomy uncertainty, the King asks us to take our stand on the Rock of our faith, to extend a hand to those still unsteady, and be the force that quiets the unhappy innermost voices of others.
May this prayer help us focus our thoughts on the assignment at hand, the works that God prepared for us in advance, the relief mission to those in the quick sand of self-ache.
Lord, help me to serve You by helping others the way You want me to. Reveal to me any area of my life where I should be giving to someone right now. Give me a generous heart to give to the poor. Help me to be a good steward of the blessings You have given me by sharing what I have with people You instruct me to help. Show me whom You want me to extend my hand to at this time. Fill me with Your love for other people and help me to communicate it in a way that can be clearly perceived. Show me how to lay down my life in some way for another brother or sister in Christ as You instruct me. Your love for me helps me love others. In Jesus’ name I pray.
Omartian, Stormie. The Power of a Praying Mom. Eugene: Harvest House Publishers, 2015, p. 88.
The Art of Choosing True Life 