I thought my chains of food addiction had been broken forever. The last six months taught me that the journey was not over. The weight kept piling on—I felt powerless to stop it. The hope that I clung to kept getting pulled farther and farther out of my grasp, just no end in sight.
Last week I saw a vision in prayer, within which were pink birds in a lush mountain and forest setting. After a little research, I found that birds symbolize transcendence, liberation, and progress toward wholeness and harmony; they are our goals, aspirations and hopes. Birds reflect our feelings about being spiritually free or clean. Pink symbolizes our motivation, drive and ambition, but also a childlike love of God.
“Hope” is the thing with feathers—
Emily Dickinson
That perches in the soul—
And sings the tune without words—
And never stops—at all—
So maybe the journey of my relationship with food was not at an ending, but at a hope-filled beginning—a progress put in motion toward wholeness and harmony, should I choose to walk that path. I choose to be spiritually cleansed of the past and have the motivation of a made-up mind to brazen future-land. I choose a mind driven toward the same hope I have had all along, that one day I will reach my goal weight and along the way learn how to stay at it. No more “fake it till you make it” lines, because if I make it, I won’t be able to fake it anymore.
Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a dream fulfilled is a tree of life.
Proverbs 13:12 (NLT)
My heart was sick the last six months, but it is no longer. While my goal-weight dream is still off on the mesmerizing horizon, it is visible with my naked eye; I know it’s only a few choices away. I see the tree of life beginning to flower as I maintain focus on my purpose: to remain fully available to God to use me however He desires. I need to be physically fit in order for Him to do so.
This Hope does not disappoint.
Even in times of trouble we have a joyful confidence, knowing that our pressures will develop in us patient endurance. And patient endurance will refine our character, and proven character leads us back to hope. And this hope is not a disappointing fantasy, because we can now experience the endless love of God cascading into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who lives in us!
Romans 5:3-5 (TPT)
Endurance is a choice-by-choice endeavor presented to us every eagerly wakeful moment. We can choose to be refined by it, or we can choose to cower behind it, never letting it complete its full work in us. Reaching my goal weight is not a fantasy; it is the sum of my unyielding determination and fixated attention to submit to God alone. He is the source of life in that tree, the food for the flowering petals, the wind raising the bird higher in transcending confidence and the tune it sings along the way. That never stops. At all.
The Art of Choosing True Life 
Amen! Well said, Holly!